Monday, May 18, 2009

A Brief Rest for a Weary Traveler

We are two different people. We love one another. But, at the same time, this love...this love...this love....is better left for later days. Right now, we are two different people, at two different places in our lives, at two different levels, but all these lead to the one conclusion that it won't work. It wouldn't work.

This is the best thing for us. This is the best thing for us. This is the best thing for us.

Repeat it enough, and you will convince yourself of it. Or so I shall like to believe. Persuade ones self to believe in this false truth, and soon, the falseness of the truth will soon become real and no longer shall it be truth, but rather, Truth.

And though I know some people may not be approving, or happy with, or will become angry with me for liking another so soon...I cannot help but be who I may be.

I become attached to people quickly, and will remain so until given reason not to be. I was given that reason three times before, and I kept trying to play dumb and let that reason slide, as though it wasn't there. It was there. Always there; never gone; a lingering shadow of toxin soon to impede upon my dream. It struck at the worst possible time, and yet, at the best. It was the dividing line. To hold on to a dream that may never work out into a reality, or to pursue a new reality altogether that may retain a treasure to delve for in the end.

But, I have become sidetracked it seems, as though I quickly become attached, I can become unattached equally as fast. Never completely mind you, as there is always that little place for someone in my heart. It shrinks, but is never gone. As though a tree has devolved and receded into its seed, waiting to see if it will be watered ever again.

It's just that after such a long, wearisome journey, I threw up my arms and gave up. At that point, that wonderful, refreshing air came through, brushing back my hair and imparting upon me the wisdom and knowledge that lead me to do what was so very hard for me to do. I said things that wrenched my heart. I am sad. But I had my mourning period. I am me, which means that I will have my time to be sad about something, but I realize that I cannot just let my life stop due to it, as life won't stop for me. I need to keep my head up and keep moving on. Always.


Roads cross and split. Roads are seemingly endless, until that sudden stop. Along that seemingly endless stretch of hardship, two separate paths may touch, intertwine, or never touch at all. Who knows how things will turn out? Roads themselves are moving. Always moving. Always.



"Sometime when you least expect it, you’ll realize that someone loved you, and that means someone can love you again. And that’ll make you smile."
-Homer Simpson

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